Loto Journal
An evolving exploration of consciousness, spirituality, relationship, and what it means to flourish together.
Through personal storytelling and curious inquiry, we explore consciousness and the Self, contemplative spirituality and mysticism, psychology and somatic healing, creativity and relationship, and our connection with nature and the living world. Along the way, our Founder, Jennifer, shares letters from her travels as a digital nomad, exploring the people, places, traditions, and sacred landscapes that continue to shape her journey.
Reader’s Note: In an attempt to bring a conscious sense of responsibility to our language (where inclusivity and equality matter), in our Loto Wellness Collective blog content, except for direct quotes, the pronouns often used for God are They/Them in reference to Great Spirit, the I AM, the Universe. Also, we have taken the liberty of capitalizing the term “True Self” or “Self” so you will know that we are not referring to the “false self” (psychological egoic self), but the foundational Self that we are in God, Imago Dei.
The Open Road is Calling
Fear of Being Seen
I know this residual fear of being fully seen—in my truth, in my body, in my voice—has kept me playing small. But next year is calling me into expansion, into more trust, into a bolder embodiment of what I've been cultivating all along on my healing journey. These mirrors I face are preparing me for what's to come.
View from the Precipice of Change
Erosion. Hmmm, that word feels like the best way to describe what life has felt like for the last two years—So many layers of my identity are being stripped down, false narratives revealed and healed, and comfort zones surrendered away.
My life mirrors this canyon landscape: each season has been carving away what no longer serves, slowly revealing what's essential.
Into the Eremos
For the mystics, the Eremos was never about isolation; it was about encounter. Even Jesus withdrew to the Eremos again and again. It was where He fasted for forty days, where He wrestled with temptation, and where angels came to minister to Him. The Eremos was both exile and embrace—the wild, quiet space where everything unnecessary fell away, leaving only God.
Rescued from the Desert
With a single bar of spotty cell service, plenty of water, food, shelter, and fuel, I decided to hunker down for the day and figure out my options. After getting a call though to my dad, who researched the problem, I welcomed my parents' invitation to drive out to my GPS location with the necessary part to fix The Beast (the name I call my Dad’s Chevrolet Suburban).
Test Me and See
This got me thinking about Joshua leading the Israelites into the promised land—conquering the walls of Jericho, not through weapons and might, but through trust and obedience. God had promised them a victory. They were to “fight” not for victory but from a place of victory. I was reminded that, as children of the One True King, we don’t have a battle to win; we have a victory to claim through faith.
Surrender, Generosity & Mission
While soaking in the tub looking out over the view of the valley, I heard the Spirit say to me, “See, I told you I would give you even more than you could ever ask or imagine. Enjoy this bath in My garden of creation.” I had been longing for my old garden soaking tub, as great as it was, but God was showing me that this longing for Egypt wouldn’t compare to what Jesus had in store for me.
Contributors & Collaborators
Loto Living and Loto Journal, would not be possible without the ongoing support and generous contributions from an incredible team of contributors, collaborators, and our Desert Mothers.