Loto Journal
Through personal storytelling and letter writing, follow our Founder, Jennifer Axcell, as she travels the 🌎 globe as a digital nomad and Desert Mother, exploring Consciousness, rest, and Self-care.
Including thoughtfully created blog content about somatic healing practices, nervous system regulation techniques, and contemplative practices, Loto Wellness Collective’s blog focuses on the art and science of rest and renewal, drawing inspiration from Christian mystics, monastic wisdom, modern neuroscience, and depth psychology.
Reader’s Note: In an attempt to bring a conscious sense of responsibility to our language (where inclusivity and equality matter), in our Loto Wellness Collective blog content, except for direct quotes, the pronouns often used for God are They/Them in reference to I AM. When referring to Jesus specifically, the pronouns He/Him are used. Also, we have taken the liberty of capitalizing the term “True Self” so you will know that we are not referring to the “false self” (psychological egoic self), but the foundational self that we are in God.
Embracing the Burn of the Fire Horse
What we're watching unfold across our feeds and news cycles is not new. The tension between Love and Fear began in the Garden. Control has always masqueraded as protection. Domination has always disguised itself as order. What is new is this: The Light is on. And when the light comes on, what has been hiding in the darkness begins to scatter. It's ugly. It's painful. And it is necessary.
🐍 Shedding the Illusion of Separation
At the Threshold of Renewal
Whales and Boats
Conscious Travel
Learning How to Eat, Pray, LOVE—Part 3
Learning How to Eat, PRAY, Love—Part 2
Learning How to EAT, Pray, Love—Part 1
Mothering
As the tears came, so did the truth: even grown women need mothering.
Surrender in Suffering
Wisdom of the Forest Dweller
North Americans spend over 93 percent of their waking hours indoors or in cars (and the other 7 percent is spent walking between buildings and cars). And while there is an extraordinary exuberance and diversity of wild plant and animal life dwelling in our midst, still the urban environment is inhospitable to the majority of species on our shared planet. Regular—or any—experience of deep wilderness is missing from most of our modern lives. Without such contact, our radiant mental and physical intelligences are being diminished.
Honoring Indigenous Voices This Thanksgiving
When we listen to Indigenous voices, we're not being "political.” We’re being Christian. Not the empire-shaped version — the Jesus-shaped one.
Mirror Twins
So let me leave you with a question, one that's been weighing on me lately: Who in your life reflects you back to yourself — not the version you wish you were, but who you truly are right now?
And maybe the harder question: Are you willing to look?
Fear of Being Seen
I know this residual fear of being fully seen—in my truth, in my body, in my voice—has kept me playing small. But next year is calling me into expansion, into more trust, into a bolder embodiment of what I've been cultivating all along on my healing journey. These mirrors I face are preparing me for what's to come.
View from the Precipice of Change
Erosion. Hmmm, that word feels like the best way to describe what life has felt like for the last two years—So many layers of my identity are being stripped down, false narratives revealed and healed, and comfort zones surrendered away.
My life mirrors this canyon landscape: each season has been carving away what no longer serves, slowly revealing what's essential.
Into the Eremos
For the mystics, the Eremos was never about isolation; it was about encounter. Even Jesus withdrew to the Eremos again and again. It was where He fasted for forty days, where He wrestled with temptation, and where angels came to minister to Him. The Eremos was both exile and embrace—the wild, quiet space where everything unnecessary fell away, leaving only God.
One Who Wrestles With God
Perhaps that is what the mystics knew all along: that sometimes the only way to find YHWH is through the body that breaks, the fever that humbles, and the desert that strips us down to the soul.
Rescued from the Desert
With a single bar of spotty cell service, plenty of water, food, shelter, and fuel, I decided to hunker down for the day and figure out my options. After getting a call though to my dad, who researched the problem, I welcomed my parents' invitation to drive out to my GPS location with the necessary part to fix The Beast (the name I call my Dad’s Chevrolet Suburban).
Deep Calls Unto Deep
Did you know that cenotes are natural freshwater sinkholes and underground cave systems formed when limestone collapses? They serve as both sacred sites and freshwater sources for the Maya. I was lucky enough to swim in the Cenotes Choo-Ha and Tankach-Ha.
Strong Plans, Loosely Held
Contributors & Collaborators
Loto Living and Loto Journal, would not be possible without the ongoing support and generous contributions from an incredible team of writers, artists, healers, editors, creatives, and pastors.